Crumpled Notebook

Since I’ve been somewhat of a grumpy monkey lately, I decided
to do an entry about 5 things that made me smile since this past
weekend. I’m sure there were more than 5, but these stuck out (no
particular order, although I’d say #4 was the best). 1. Listening
to Jess and Franny sing at church on Sunday. 2. Seeing Elijah in a
giraffe suit. 3. Talking to Crystal on the phone today. 4. Being
told, “Thanks Ms. Melissa. You’re the best.” 5. 4 little words:
Macaroni & Tomatoe Juice

Some more thoughts and I think I’m through. I may post some more pictures, but that should be about it.

When I saw this picture below, I knew immediately where it was. I can’t even begin to explain the numbing feeling that came over me. Even though in my head this is what I’d thought it would look like based on the numerous news articles I’ve read, I was still shocked to see this. I’m looking at it, thinking, “oh, that’s where the store was” and “Oh, our house was here” and “down this way is where so and so lived.” It’s nuts. When people in the articels said “it’s gone,” I was thinking flooding and damage, but still expected there to be something left. Looking at this, it doesn’t look like it. There is a bit more of the town that isn’t shown, but I can’t imagine it being very much different.

What is going through my head right now is that, I’m sitting here, in awe, numb, in shock, and this wasn’t even my home. I mean, I lived there for about 6 months, but most of the residents there had been there 10, 20, 30 years. I know before Joe died, he had lived there for about 25 years I think. Again, I am just so grateful that Mom moved when she did. I’m also grateful that very few people were killed by this. I can’t imagine anyone surviving if they had stayed in Holly Beach or the surrounding area, based on this picture. But even though there were fewer casualties than Katrina, for the survivors, I think the devastation is probably just as great. I can’t even think about the possibility of leaving my home, evacuating, taking what few things I can with me, and having absolutely nothing to come back to. Not even having a town to come back to, or neighbors. Potentially never seeing your town again. Maybe never seeing your friends and neighbors again. I can’t even fathom that idea. Just think of the millions of people, the survivors of both Katrina and Rita, that have to live that thought. It really is times like these when I really do want to question God. I don’t. I mean, who am I? Where was I when He so delicately laid the earth’s foundations? I guess its more a question of “why these people?” Why do they deserve to lose everything they have, while I sit on my couch in the comfort of my home and read about it? Why a state that has already lost so much in the past month? I know, there are no answers for this. But I do know this: I feel fortunate to be able to sleep in my own bed everynight; to wake up to sunlight and not rain; to sit and watch t.v. with my cat; to pick up the phone and call my friends and family and not wonder where they are and if they are safe. I feel fortunate that I have frozen corndogs in my freezer to eat when I’m too lazy to cook a meal and not have to depend on anyone else or a Salvation Army canteen to eat.

I plan to call one of my step-brothers this week and make sure everyone there is okay and find out how they are otherwise, homes, etc…

This picture below was Holly Beach. I’ll add in later the spot where mom and Joe’s home/motel was.

Update: "http://www.katc.com/Global/story.asp?S=3895697">Here’s another
article.

CAMERON PARISH _ Fishing communities in were reduced to
splinters, with concrete slabs the only evidence of homes that once
stood there. Debris was strewn for miles by water or wind.
Holly Beach, a popular vacation and fishing spot, was
simply gone - white caps on the Gulf of Mexico lapping where camps
had been.

Another article says: “The hurricane swept Holly Beach, a community
of crabbing and vacation camps, off the map. Rows of concrete slabs
show where houses once stood.” "http://www.nytimes.com/2005/09/25/national/nationalspecial/26cnd-storm2.html?hp&ex=1127707200&en=c6f51f2dc7952dcc&ei=5094&partner=homepage">
This New York Times article, about mid way down talks more
about Holly Beach and it’s neighbor town, Johnson Bayou.

Still, the storm caused extensive damage in some areas.
In Louisiana, along Highway 82, which runs parallel to the Gulf of
Mexico, houses were “gone,” said a Navy helicopter crewman, Ken
Smith. Johnson’s Bayou and Holly Beach were apparently devastated.
“No people, no nothing,” Mr. Smith said, referring to Holly Beach.
“We keep hearing reports that basically it’s non-existent,” said
Tracy Webb, a volunteer for the Cameron Parish Office for Emergency
Preparedness, of Johnson’s Bayou.

I’ll just keep posting in this entry when I learn new things about
what is going on down there and get some pictures, etc… CNN has a
good "http://www.cnn.com/2005/WEATHER/09/24/rita/index.html">article
about what’s know about the damage in Lake Charles right now.
They’re saying the Lake Charles area was hit the harderst (and I’m
guessing everything between it and the Gulf). Another "http://www.cnn.com/2005/WEATHER/09/24/rita/index.html">article
I read has reports of 9 feet of water in Holly Beach. I’m guessing
at this point, it’s probably been hard for many to get into much of
Cameron Parish so more will probably know about the state there
later. Supposedly the whole parish evacuated with the exception of
3 hold-outs. It seems I read somewhere that Louisiana is one of the
states where even if they make evacuation mandantory and order it,
they can’t legally enforce it. I guess they sent the military down
to try and get these 3 guys to leave, but was unsuccessful. I’m not
sure where in Cameron Parish they were, there are several small
communities down there. "http://www.cnn.com/2005/WEATHER/09/24/rita/index.html">More on
Lake Charles. Also on that page, there is a video showing some
damage to one of the buildings there, a bank I think. Anyway, I
actually worked in that building for a short time for Sprint (there
are lots of other businesses in there too). The video is in the
right hand section of the page about 1/4-1/2 way down. There is a
green heading that says “watch” and it’s the 2nd video there that
says “Damage in Downtown Lake Charles.” It’s got a java link, or
I’d link directly to it.

“PostSecret is an ongoing community art project where people mail-in their secrets anonymously on one side of a homemade postcard.” So basically, this guy that does this site probably knows more secrets that the pentagon. Some are funny, like the one below. Others are creepy. Some are really sad. It’s funny how we’re willing to share our deepest secrets with everyone in the world, except the people we know.

I just read a surreal article about Hurricane Rita that was done with some residents of Holly Beach, LA, which is where my mom has called home for the past 8 years. According to the article, everyone has gotten out. There are about 300 residents. Anyway, it was done with the man who built a Christian Camp/Resort type thing down there. I never went to it as it wasn’t a regular church, but it was nice and it seemed to be a good place for youth groups to go on retreats and stuff. It’s just crazy though cause these people are leaving there, never expecting to see their town again. Like I said before, it’s not even a mile wide, a few blocks at most. Most of the homes and camps down there are older (camps is what they call their houses, rentals and beach houses). Even the ones on elevated and that are newer couldn’t withstand a hit this hard. I know my mom’s place couldn’t and most places are about like that. In fact, if anything could withstand it, it would be the church camp, but that is still unlikely. I tried to find you a link on Wikipedia to Holly Beach, but the best I could do was Cameron, LA, since Holly Beach isn’t really an incorporated town. It’s just a touristy place, much like Pebble Beach isn’t a real city (except they don’t have million dollar homes there or golf courses–but they do have 4 bars, 1 church, 2 mini-stores and NO Gas stations). Here are some random person’s pictures though. I don’t know any of these people, but I definately recognize the places.

I’m just sitting here, having this surreal moment. First, I’m so thankful that Mom moved when she did (March of this year). I know that if Joe was still alive, while they may have evacuated with everyone else, they would have been some of the last ones to leave. Everything they had would have been destroyed. In fact, Mom still has things down there because she wasn’t able to bring much with her when she moved. So I just thank God that she is safe and well in Kentucky. I know had she still lived there, without Joe being alive, she would have been one of those people who would have had to depend on someone else to literally save their life due to her health right now. They would have had to make her go kicking and screaming. I’m also feeling a bit scared for my family down there (even if they aren’t technically my family anymore) and the other people I know. Even though I know that they are most likely in a safe place, the thought of them losing their homes and knowing they are going to have to rebuild not only homes, but their lives, just saddens me. I want to go and be there with these people. I want to help them. I want to see what becomes of Holly Beach and Cameron Parish and Lake Charles. I want to see my parent’s home.

I guess with Hurricane Katrina it was different for me. I saw the pictures and video on the tv and was in shock, but it still didn’t seem real. I felt for these people, I wanted to help them, but it wasn’t personal. This time its real. This time its personal. This time it affects many people I know and places I have not only been, but lived and made a life in. A place that my mom called home for the past 8 years. A place I knew I always had a home at and even considered it home for a short time.

I guess you can say that this time it has truely hit home.