Crumpled Notebook

So, funny thing tonight–well, at least my only regular readers, Crystal and Misty, will get a kick out of it.

It actually started last night–I saw a bulletin post on myspace from an old friend (read: ex-boyfriend) about how his “niece” had to be taken to the hospital and was in ICU when he posted. She’s not actually his niece, but he just refers to himself as “uncle  xyz” because they’re close, he’s kinda like a dad to her, etc…. Anyway, he was asking for prayer, so I wrote to him, told him I’d pray for them (and I did). That’s not really the funny, interesting part though.

By the way, she’s all better now, thankfully.

He replied thanking me and so this evening I replied to him, closing with “Love, Melissa”. Then I was like, “oh, I can’t put that, he’s married” (of course he is, all of my ex-boyfriends are married). But I realized I put it because he put it in his. Even funnier was that the first email I wrote to him, I almost put it, and figured it would be weird. So when he responded with it, I didn’t think much about it and did the same.

Okay, I’m probably not being clear. It’s obviously not a “love” like romantic type thing. I can’t even say for sure that I “love” him in much of any way. But isn’t it funny how that last people on the earth that you ever thought you’d find yourself writing “love, xyz” to in an email, some 13-14 years later (okay, as if it wasn’t clear, I guess that gives away who the person is), is someone you end up writing it to? I mean, seriously, of all of my ex-boyfriends, minus the psycho ones, I doubted this would be the one that when I’m sitting here, on the verge of age 29, be giving my support and love (platonic) to. It’s not like we’re gonna be hanging out anytime soon or anything. I don’t know. I’m not making sense, but I just found it amusing that I can say that to someone that I’ve never ever claimed to love, and on some levels, actually mean it. It’s like, my childhood/youth love or something, and I’m so far beyond it, that all the stupid stuff we’ve done to each other or said about each other, is past. So, I think that means, at age 28 years, 10 months and 18 days, I’m officially an adult. I can officially “love” someone that I used to love to “love” and use to love to “hate.”

Are you confused? I know I am :-)