Crumpled Notebook

I get so discouraged sometimes. I went out to a Sunday evening service at one of those “super churches” in our community. I didn’t end up staying because although when I went in, people were standing around the door within 5 feet or less of me, the entire time I was in there, no one spoke or acknowledged my presence. Now, I’m the first person to admit that I can’t just walk into a room and start up conversations with people. But seriously, out of the 20 people in the room, no one can say anything to me? I’ve had similar experiences at other churches here, usually larger churches since they are the only ones that seem to have a younger generation type service in the evenings. The other wasn’t quiet as bad. I actually like their services and their preacher, but of the several times I went over the course of several months, I can count exactly 1 conversation I had with anyone outside of “hi” during the welcome time. These places just aren’t very welcoming for anyone who has the slightest problem meeting people. Especially people who go in without knowing anyone else there.

The sad thing is that my main purpose for going is to meet people. I enjoy my morning church service. I wish I had a Bible study or something to go to with people my age, but I’d settle for other Christian friends, as I don’t really have a lot of them (most of my friends out here are not Christian).

It’s just frustrating, disappointing and discouraging. Maybe I expect too much. Maybe I’m used to my church jumping every time a new person walks through the door because one extra person really DOES make a difference when your church is small. Don’t get me wrong about the churches I’ve tried. I’ve seen some great things they do. I’m just saying that I think going into them, a bit outside of what everyone else is, or with someone else, when you’re not the outgoing person, is hard.

So, anyone got any ideas? I’m going crazy and am to the point of giving up.